Comments on: Memoir: Agony and Relief

By: Day 28 of 365 ~ Magic Mirrors | Lav Chintapalli

Day 28 of 365 ~ Magic Mirrors | Lav Chintapalli — Sat, 15 Aug 2015 02:52:13 +0000

[…] journal, Women Writers, Women Books requesting that I write another article, since my first one, Memoir: Agony and Relief, had received a good response. Yesterday evening, after all the uplifting updates were done and I […]

By: Discipline of Writing. Writing as a Discipline. : Women Writers, Women Books

Discipline of Writing. Writing as a Discipline. : Women Writers, Women Books — Thu, 05 Apr 2012 15:33:20 +0000

[…] This is Lav Chintapalli’s 2nd guest essay with us. Her first was Memoir: Agony and Relief. […]

By: Darlene Craviotto

Darlene Craviotto — Sat, 25 Feb 2012 08:38:13 +0000

In reply to Lav Chintapalli. Yes, that's my book. And no, I can't say that I regret having written it. It was important for me, as a personal journey, to have written the book. The hostility that was directed at me early on came from a small group of Michael Jackson fans that were more interested in venerating him as an idol than viewing him as a human being. But since writing that comment to you I've had other people contact me who not only appreciate the portrait of Michael in the book, but who also understand the story to be more about a writer's life in Hollywood than a biographical portrait of Michael Jackson.

By: Lav Chintapalli

Lav Chintapalli — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 20:19:43 +0000

In reply to Darlene Craviotto.

Darlene,

First, thank you for the thoughtful reply. Second, I applaud you for penning your memoir – this takes guts. Third, congrats on getting it published. This step takes a whole lot of heart. I know you weren’t expecting ‘alienation, hostility, or unwanted sympathy’ but was there any thought that flashed by your mind as you were writing about ‘others’, about what they might think or how they might perceive your work? Either way, I am very sorry to hear that you are experiencing a back-lash. Is it so bad that you are regretting writing it?

I’ve always wondered if published-memoir authors live – exist – among those that they have written about, or do they write after they have removed themselves from the situation and people. It looks like you belong to the former category, in which case it must be very hard. How do you navigate those relations? BTW, is your book: ‘An Agoraphobic’s Guide to Hollywood: How Michael Jackson Got Me Out of the House’?

Wishing you much healing.
Lav.

By: Darlene Craviotto

Darlene Craviotto — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 20:27:06 +0000

Thank you for such an insightful and thought-provoking article! I recently had a memoir published, and I’ve found much of what you’ve written here to be true. There is much “agony and relief” in the act of sharing something so personal with a reader—a person who essentially is a stranger. My background is screenwriting—a very distancing genre of writing, and I found that the only way I could write my memoir was to look at my role in the story as a character. That technique helped me complete the first draft, and it was only in the many drafts that followed could I layer in my most innermost thoughts, feelings, and reflections. I applaud you for writing the implied warning that should be attached to any attempt at writing a memoir: “…the catch with most memoirs is that they highlight folk in a not-so-pleasant-light which may ultimately lead to ripple effects of alienation, hostility, or unwanted sympathy.” Perhaps I’m naive, but I did not expect “alienation, hostility, or unwanted sympathy” when my memoir was published, and yet, there’s much truth in your statement. There will always be a few people (for whatever reason) who will use your writing to lash out or to simply vent. My only disagreement with you comes in your assertion that “a writer who publishes a memoir has obviously accepted the fact.” That fact never even crossed my mind when I was writing my memoir. I fear that had I known, I might never have attempted writing it.

By: Day 28 of 365 ~ Magic Mirrors « Observing Ourselves Observing

Day 28 of 365 ~ Magic Mirrors « Observing Ourselves Observing — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 11:31:03 +0000

By: Lav Chintapalli

Lav Chintapalli — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 14:12:36 +0000

In reply to Wendy.

Thanks for the suggestion Wendy! And as you said, there needs to be a point to the story, whether fiction or nonfiction – ramblings will not do. I will surely check it out.

Thanks for reading my post and the comment!

Cheers,
Lav.

By: Lav Chintapalli

Lav Chintapalli — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 14:09:20 +0000

In reply to TheBitterchick.

Sorry for the late reply! I just saw your response – a bit of a time lapse.

I hope that from July till now, you have attempted to pen something. When I think back to when I started memoir-writing, all I remember was being afraid – afraid of what would come out, who would see it etc. I was terrified. But I forced myself to start …

I blogged about this topic on my personal blog – I called it Building Tolerance.

You can read it here:
http://lavchintapalli.wordpress.com/2010/01/17/building-up-tolerance/ ‎

And if you post a reply on my blog, I will get to you much faster. 🙂

Wishing you well!
Lav.

By: Memoir: Agony and Relief « Observing Ourselves Observing

Memoir: Agony and Relief « Observing Ourselves Observing — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 12:15:55 +0000

[…] article, Memoir: Agony and Relief, has been published in the online journal, Women Writers, Women Books on June 8, […]

By: Wendy

Wendy — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 06:04:14 +0000

Interesting article and on a topic I’ve been thinking about. I also enjoy reading memoirs and like those that tell a story but also deliver a message.

I recently read ‘In the midst of life’ by Jennifer Worth. I highly recommend this book by a nurse with a lifetime’s experience and knowledge to share. Her story, or stories, are quite engrossing and perhaps a fine example of your point about narration. her story moved me while I read but also left me thinking on, after I finished, not just about her but the theme of her story.