Comments on: Childless writers: should we use the childbirth metaphor for the act of writing?

By: Third novel delivered, and the Reith Lectures, 2016 | Angela Young

Third novel delivered, and the Reith Lectures, 2016 | Angela Young — Mon, 14 Nov 2016 06:21:03 +0000

[…] obviously, but I rather like swimilarity here) is in the forgetting of the pain, afterwards; some wonder whether the metaphor is apt if you’ve never given (physical) birth, as I haven’t; some say the two have absolutely […]

By: Stacy Dymalski

Stacy Dymalski — Fri, 11 Sep 2015 19:01:47 +0000

Hi Paula,
I loved your post. It’s incredibly compassionate and considerate to all women, no matter whether they’ve had children or not. However, as a mother of two sons, an author, and a teacher who teaches writing and self-publishing at the college level, I ABSOLUTELY feel that writing a book, or creating any type of art, for that matter, is like giving birth. Yes, it’s a different kind of labor, but nevertheless, it’s a piece of you that you create, that you unleash upon the world, hopefully to make the world a better place. To say that women who birth humans are the only ones who get to say they labored over their creations would also mean that parents who adopt should not be allowed to take credit for the successes of their adoptive children. Ridiculous.

And in the end, neither you nor I are responsible for anyone who is offended by the the metaphor of “giving birth to a story.” If such a person exists, that is their issue, not ours. They are free to think what they think, just as we are free to think what we think. I’m not responsible for someone else’s issues or opinions. That’s the beauty of diversity.

Thanks again for your though-provoking post!

By: Paula Coston

Paula Coston — Wed, 31 Dec 2014 13:56:16 +0000

In reply to Margaret Reardon. How very interesting, Margaret! Thanks for putting me onto this book, and Eliot's own comment. I have to say, though, that after the euphoria of publication of my novel I fell into a deep slough of despond. Friends who HAVE had children have wondered if it might be akin to post-natal depression. Still, I'm bobbing back up now, and beginning to think about the next book!

By: Margaret Reardon

Margaret Reardon — Wed, 31 Dec 2014 02:43:37 +0000

Just reading today “My Life in Middlemarch” by Rebecca Mead (her study of George Eliot’s life, her novel Middlemarch and how Mead finds echoes of them in her own life. Eliot compares, in a conversation, finishing a novel to giving birth, which leaves her empty, a dry husk. Mead, a mother, notes that Eliot had never given birth to a child and thinks she had the wrong idea about childbirth, if not about writing novels; Mead’s own experience left her “feeling more alive and vital and necessary.” Terrific book.

By: Paula Coston

Paula Coston — Wed, 09 Apr 2014 12:25:25 +0000

In reply to Judith van Praag.

Dear Judith
I was stunned by your heartrending tale.

If you have read about me, you will know that I have also lost the possibility of children – but not in the physical sense: purely through failures to adopt, and the onset of the menopause before I met any suitable partner with whom to make a family. I extend to you all my womanly fellow feeling, and thanks so much for sharing what you have been through.

By: Judith van Praag

Judith van Praag — Wed, 09 Apr 2014 03:53:38 +0000

As a word smith for hire, be that reporter or copy writer, I can conceive of, produce and deliver my stories about others and their endeavors without a problem, when they’ re due, in time, crafted with care. The writing I have the hardest time sharing is that which focuses on myself, my family, my people. Hundreds of thousands of words I’m unable to let go of. Twenty-two years ago our baby girl suffocated during the last five minutes of her vaginal delivery I want to hold on to what I’ve created without making my creation visible outside the computer. Reading the above, including the comments, I can very well imagine my anticipation of loss is not too far fetched to fathom, yet too great to want to experience again. After four subsequent miscarriages I can’t imagine a good outcome. The labor of love, pulls in opposite directions, and yet in the end the intention is to purge, to expel, to empty, let go. Labor pains at times start much sooner than the “moment supreme”. Let’s say my books are due, they’re just not ready to come out yet.

By: Paula Coston

Paula Coston — Wed, 19 Mar 2014 12:21:25 +0000

It’s great to get all the feedback so far! But don’t forget, folks, that I wasn’t just noting that the act of writing is compared to childbirth because of any agony involved, but because of its complex, protracted nature, and the way an idea may ‘germinate’ and grow out of our control, as perhaps children do in some sense! As one of you says, creating a piece of writing is multi-faceted – just as the experience of human reproduction is!

Keep the comments coming!

By: Kat

Kat — Wed, 19 Mar 2014 12:01:17 +0000

I haven’t given birth, but I have had a gall stone attack, which I’m told rates similarly on the pain scale. Certainly it was incapacitating and lasted for a long time (18 hours). Given that and some other health grief I’ve gone through, I admit I’ve got tired of being told by mothers I don’t know what childbirth is like.

Having said that, it’s not a metaphor I use. I don’t like every strenuous, lengthy effort being lumped in with giving birth. It’s not fair to the efforts, and it stereotypes giving birth. Some women — including my sister-in-law — take only three or four hours and handle the pain well. Both writing and giving birth are too multi-faceted to be reduced to a shorthand for agony.

By: Childless writers: should we use the childbirth metaphor for the act … | ChildBirth 101

Tue, 18 Mar 2014 15:36:14 +0000

[…] Here is the original post: Childless writers: should we use the childbirth metaphor for the act … […]

By: Lori Schafer

Lori Schafer — Tue, 18 Mar 2014 15:28:07 +0000

The childbirth metaphor is not one I would use for myself, and not because I don’t have children. It just doesn’t fit how I feel about writing. Actually, the Zeus/Athena comparison works better for me – I think of writing more as yanking some nagging irritation out of my brain than struggling for endless hours to push it out of my you-know-where 🙂 However, as your article clearly demonstrates, everyone has their own view of the creative process, and should be entitled to liken it to whatever they want.